How to answer a personal ad.

Dear Mistress,
I am new to this and am wondering: How do I approach a potential Mistress
after seeing Her Personals ad?


As a lifestyle Mistress, novice submissives constantly approach Me with no idea
as to the proper procedure for answering a FemDom Personals ad. For the sincere
novice slave, this is definitely a predicament. Below you will find a list of things to
keep in mind and consider when making this exciting first plunge into the “scene”.

First and foremost, always be respectful. “Honey”, “Baby”, and “Darling” are never
appropriate titles for any person you respect, especially a Mistress. Never refer
to any woman as “Mistress” before being given permission to do so, as this can be
seen as disrespectful. Just remember you will never offend anyone with formality.

Always read Her ad and profile carefully and reference mutual interests. These
should be the things that have attracted you to this particular ad. If writing, let
Her know you will be duplicating Her ad with information about yourself. Then follow
her lead, give the same information which she describes in Hers, (i.e. mutual interests, experience level, education, location, etc.) in basically the same
order and format. This will enable Her to learn answers to questions that
are obviously important to Her and give you a format to write your response in an
organized and concise manner. Be sure to include any ways you might be of use
to her in a non-sexual capacity. Remember there are thousands of slaves willing
and able to be of sexual service. Are you a carpenter? Do you enjoy housework?
Enjoy giving long foot massages? Remember any way you can make Her life
easier and more enjoyable, the more likely She is to give you what you need as
far as BDSM goes.

Understand that She cannot read your mind. It is your responsibility to tell Her
what you want and need out of serving Her, what your limits and interests are,
as well as your mental and physical health. This should not necessarily be done
in the initial contact, but be prepared to answer these questions when She asks
or the discussion opens up. This is also the time to let Her know of any extreme or
bizarre compulsions or interests that you are into that may come up later. It is
better to get those more eccentric interests out in the open earlier rather than
later.

NOTE: You should be very careful what you ask for from any Dominant, even
if it’s been your long term fantasy, because you just might get it, and fantasy is
NOT reality.

The most important thing to remember is to be completely honest and up front.
If you are not, She will find out and you will most likely be banished from Her
presence forever. Do not be foolish enough to the think your façade will make
it through her screening process, as it usually does not. Always make necessary
information readily available to Her. A Mistress does not have the time or
interest to interrogate pertinent information from you. If you make this a difficult
task, it is highly unlikely the result will be erotic or fun. Think of BDSM in more than relevant terms. What is hard to you may be soft to Her. Your idea of a painslut could be mild in Her eyes. Are you a masochist? Are you a submissive? Both? In what proportions? Are you a natural slave or a freeman who wants to serve his Dominant? Are you truly submissive or a man who enjoys “letting go” on occasion? If you want erotic pain, do you want it light or heavy or in-between? And what do those words mean? What’s heavy to you might be light to Her. Try to describe what you want by reference to shared common, painful experiences from sports or
wherever. In closing, keep in mind that psychos are not only male. There are some sick and evil people out there and if you are restrained all your “manly strength” will do nothing for you. When you do get to meet a Dominant, make sure FIRST
that She believes in Safe Words. Then, set up a Safe Call for yourself... and let
Her know you’ve done so. Do not let your little head put you into a dangerous
situation.

Bloody Butterfly Kisses,
Domina Betka Schpitz